& my world will be coloured.

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Never talk behind her back

I suddenly remembered.......and it left a BITTEr taste in my mouth.......

It happened one day when i went out with alvin, his dear friend A and A's girlfriend. I shall NOT mention whatshisname as im not as blunt as what he thinks i am. All along, EVERYONE including he himself gave me the impression that he hits on super chio, super hot...whatever kind of girls alright. And one day, he got himself a girlfriend...and one day...i happen to see his gf. Well, it did happen coincidentally that Alvin told me before we met him that A getting girlfriends was a "seasonal" thing. And so, with whatever impression i had of him, i presumed that his gf would have known that la....and during a meal together with A and his gf, i accidentally blurted the fact out...thinking that she wouldnt think anything of it since she was together with him and SHE should have known. Well...i do admit that was an accident and it just came out....i dont think it was a good idea to say that and i do realise it....

But THEN, after that incident, that dear friend A was complaining about how blunt i was to Alvin and all. Fine....if it's just between the two of them, i really dont care. But he had to tell the like "everyone" else who knew he and Vin la. BEst. Made me damn pissed already. And still dare to say im blunt. Now who's the blunt one?

A mistake is a mistake. Just tell me and i wont do it again. But do you have to tell the WHOLE world and let the WHOLE world knows about it except me?

How the hell do i know about this? Oh well, it happened on this darn day when i saw Vin's OTHER friend, YX topless in his room...his back was sunburnt and it looked pretty uneven so i just simply asked a question: "What happened to your back? Are you having a rash?" Simple, question from a person who's concerned about a friend. And thanks ar, what i got was , " I finally see A's point now." This left me puzzled. What point where they talking about? YX and Vin seems to have a common understanding about some "point". Fine....so i grilled Vin about it lor....and he told me about some friend called A telling some friends that some girl A was "blunt".

IT does sound petty...doesn't it? But talk about bluntness....i dont think i was the only one here....

And in this whole stupid incident....Vin did NOT defend me at all. And i thought he was the person who knew me best. Boy was i disappointed. You can just let your friends put me down like that without saying a word in defense. Suddenly i feel so distant, so isolated. What people say behind your back really reflects alot on your relationship. And the fact that he said nothing....just shattered my heart into a million pieces.....yet i never showed my disappointment. He never knew what i said behind his back.....but i never take any negative comments about him lying down. This time, i'm just so disappointed. Makes me wonder what other bf's would do if this happened to them. Perhaps they wouldn't say a thing also.....but if so, they wouldn't be worth keeping really.

And i learnt something from this too.........please do keep your comments about your friend's partner to yourself....or it's BOUND TO BE disastrous. I'm like an erupting volcano right now...and i have a reason to be so. When a piscean's hurt by BLUNT words.....it really hurt.......and she might never recover again.....

allie ♥ 3:16 PM

Monday, August 29, 2005

Shall quit rebonding my hair ...

Had a fulfilling week last week. Was working throughout the whole week without much slacking in between.

Went for a change of hairstyle....i rebonded my hair again! But sadly....i regretted it again...cos my ends were "Fried" for the third time in a row. I dont understand why my rebonding experiences never turned out as successful as my first one at Supercuts. My first rebonding job at Supercuts was super nice....the ends were beautifully intact, and the texture of my hair was soft and silky. This effect lasted me for one FULL year.

Second time i went, my hair was totally fried...not just the ends. The hairdresser didnt warn me about not going for rebonding after i bleached my hair...and my hair was spoiled as a result. Good thing i knew about Loreal Smooth intense...it pretty much saved my hair from there....

Third time i went, i had FULL BLACK HAIR. No colour, no bleach...and yet my ends weren't well done. There were still some frizzy ends and te rebonding lasted barely 2 months. Silky effect only lasted one day somemore. This is my second worst rebonding job done. Sighhhh........so disappointed.

Now, this is my fourth time rebonding my hair....did it at Chapter 2 Bugis. The top of my head was alright...all silky and shiny. But my ends were all frizzy and the back of my hair became slightly wavy overnight. This time round, my hair was coloured. When i went back to the hairdresser, she said that it was probably because my my colouring job included some bleach inside. I told her it was impossible! Cos i had told my colourist SPECIFICALLY NOT TO add bleach. So i was 120% sure it wasn't bleached. I gave the reason saying that only my ends were bleached and she came up with some excuse saying that the ends usually absorb colour less readily so in order to get even colour, it's subjected to more damage. Well...whatever....till that point i seriously dont give a damn anymore....cos there's nothing they would wanna do to help my hair. Sigh....i am so disappointed again. But the good thing is my hair is still generally more straight than before. However, still gotta wait for a few more weeks to conclude whether it can stand the test of time.

WEll, here's my new hairstyle...

Not much straighter IMO really...but neater than before definitely.

Well....i think i will just swear off rebonding my hair ever again. To me, it's just a wait of money. I could have put my money to better use next time. Maybe i shall try perming? Hmmmm......

Worked at Hello! shop on saturday. IT was pretty fun selling phones really....it's just a pity that i was selling a PDA phone...which was TREMENDOUSLY difficult to sell due to the high cost involved. Well...i kinda liked the environment cos my colleagues were people around my age....or RATHER younger than me really. HAha...i feel old....even though many people do say im still young. Well, at 21 years of age...when many of your colleagues are like 18, 19 years...it does make you feel a lot older ya know. The good thing is.....they think i look like im 18,19!! Heh...this is not the first time already........and im glad to hear that!

At least i managed to sell ONE phone...haha. A great achievement considering that i received absolutely NO training whatsoever. I just got the phone 10 mins prior to the opening of the shop and i had to work from there. Glad that i learnt lots of things along the way...and dealt with tough situations in the process too. Being an almost tech-idiot....im proud of what i have done! Haha.....

Then again, i wouldnt be able to do so if not for certain "guardian angels" who helped me a lot on the way. Like the uncle who was my first "customer" of the day in the sense that he already bought the phone...but helped me to figure the phone out. Then again, there's this other promoter for a competing brand, who taught me the main functions of the phone, and helped me find the specific functions of the phone which customers asked to see. IF not for them, i would have been LOST really....and my fellow promoter didnt exactly help in getting me out of the that lost state.

Oh well...working did get my mind off alot of things...first of all is the projects which are really piling up their workload.....though it's physically tiring...at least it wasn't as mentally demanding.

Sunday, went shopping for mooncakes with my mum...bought many mooncakes. It was the 4th consecutive day that i went to bugis junction...having done my hair there, ate dinner, worked, and shopped their on each of the days. HAha...and i met the other promoter there again...who thought i was really late for work.

That pretty much sums up my week....gotta work on my article for the newsletter now...sighhh

allie ♥ 12:30 PM

Friday, August 19, 2005

no time to blog...no mood to blog...

So busy these days....sigh.....the past (havent really passed) week has been an eventful week for me. Sunday i had a volleyball match, tues n wed volleyball match. Thursday went to do research on Stikfas, friday gotta call up media companies to get them to let us do case study....saturday study stikfas, sunday focus group. Wow....eventful is the right word man....

Seems like this can only get worse....and the only comfort i get is through shopping...both online and offline...heh....but im going broke...cos i bought sooo many things (at least to a frugal me, it is alot!)...

butterfly bag from Urban outfitters!

Green wedges from Minou and blouse from The Box!!

Love all my buys! Just thinking of them makes me happy...hehe....relieves me of some stress. But the sad thing is, i cant spend anymore this month.....gotta save up for the rainy rainy day...which can be pretty often these days.....like the $200 that just flew outta my wallet out of a sudden without warning...sianzzzzzzzzzz........

Feeling kinda down too.....dearie not really hue-ing me these days. He doesnt seem to care as much for me as before. Like yesterday, when we were going back to his room to watch project superstar, there were already tons of people inside the room - YX's friends. And i couldnt see the TV at all. He didnt care. Instead, it was YX that cared. YX told his friends to move over....so harsh that none of them dared to block my view after that......it made me partly happy, partly sad. And while watching the show, dearie didnt hue me either...just played his stupid maple story. Damn sad la alright.....

I wonder if we've been together for too long he's starting to forget about me...i mean...he's really starting to take me for granted i feel. I mean...i dont mind doing all those things for him but he doesnt seem to appreciate all that i'm doing. Like the time when he didnt even ask me whether i wanted a place in his club. Fine, it's HIS club...but he didnt even bother to ask...and just went ahead with his own recruitment. I feel as if im transparent. Last time, he always asks me for opinions and stuff. Nowadays, i had to find out things thru the emails he sends me through the club email. Very well.........it just makes me sadder........

I'm getting more depressed as im typing here....though he keeps saying he cares, he hues....but then actions not realli = words. That's what made me really sad. When i tell others, they seem to make a really big deal outta it...but my dearie dun seem to care....dun seem to have any reaction....seems to take it for granted that i will be there. I mean i will.....right?

allie ♥ 4:27 PM

Thursday, August 11, 2005

naughty me...

I did a naughty thing today...heh. Knowing how much my dearie like superstar contestant - Derrick...i changed his wallpaper!! Haha...it was derrick initially and i put my face in his place now....

Dunno what he will say.....see what happens when he sees it after work...muahahahahahaha

allie ♥ 7:27 PM

Monday, August 08, 2005

gonna MIA this sem...

As usual...i like seeing photos on my blog so....more photos!!

This is me with my new specs! Very different huh....

Decided that i should have more expressions when taking photos...heh...

Anyway, not much time to update. It's the first 3 weeks of school and i have like TONS of work to do. Research for communication campaigns, presentations, branding assignments, case studies on organisations, volleyball trainings, volleyball competitions, inter block games, risk management stuff....sigh....and i thought i already cut down on the number of ECAs i have.....

This sem's gonna be SUPER DUPER busy. Oh ya....i still got PPC practicum...means MORE WORK! So i think i'm gonna MIA soon.....

allie ♥ 11:39 PM

Friday, August 05, 2005

Personality of an Aries Man

ARIES MANHe always let other people walk in front of him, but he will get there first. He is a very careful guy and small obstacles won't make him fall easily even he thinks life is a very serious matter. He is as romantic as any other Zodiac. He could look gentle, but inside he is as strong as steel. Once he determines to do something, he is serious about doing it well. He will keep any pressure or insult deep down inside without showing emotion. You will never see his emotion of burden or disappointment and always wonder what he thinks or feels. He will well kept his feeling.You will never see a guy in this Zodiac involving in other people business. He always concern with his own business. Sometimes he can be talkative, but he will never give anyone advice if he has not been asked. If you ask for advice, he will certainly give you one. He respects elderly and senior, so you will see he is the type who visits his parents steadily or often.He is a slightly shy but also a stubborn person. He will find many ways to make you happy when you are with him, till you realize he is the important person for you. Once he is in the "Power Position", he will use his power gently. He is a good leader and "Gentleness" is one of his effective method for exploiting his power. It is although he is borne to be a leader.He never hides his ambition, and he is a workaholic. He will not take any position that he has no control. He will work very hard to reach his goal and satisfaction.Compliment from his boss or superior are never enough for him, he want his deserved reward. His deep insecurity makes him reach and collecting valuable things, and this you may think he is stingy. Actually he could easily spending money to buy things, traveling or pay for things that makes him happy and he think necessary for his need. He cares what other people think of him and wants to get good comments or compliments.Outside he looks like stone and steel, but inside he is a fragile person. He will hide and cover up weak emotion and his sadness in order to maintain and keep up his "Image". One method of cover up you could easily notice is suddenly if he is quiet, cold, or act very strong or very secured. Often, he feels insecure, even he is serious about his life and his own surrounding.This is the man who never hurries to get marry, so hardly sit back and regret about his marriage later. If he gets marry, he need to be very certain and very sure. It will take a long time for such decision, so if you tell him that you are "breaking up”, you better forget him for good because he will never coming back.He always keeps his promise. If he said he would meet you in your place in 2 hours then he will be there, unless there is a serious accident or unavoidable things happen. He hates people who are late for date or any appointment.He likes to think woman should be a follower and take care of family and working is a man duty. He does not like to compete with his girlfriend or his wife at work because competition already exists with himself and other people. He will be very proud if he can afford and care for his family. Do not try to over power him or insult him, he cannot stand it. He likes to be in control of every things, every situations.He like a "Classy Woman”, if she also comes from a good family then it is a Plus. It will make him feel proud and very ego about her status. Flashy type of woman, forget it. He like a perfect or a nearly perfect housewife. He tends to be possessive. He will not tell you if he is mad at you, but will act very moody to show you instead.He likes to hear sweet word and compliment so you can get his interest that way. If he approaches you to ask you out, do not act too stubborn or fooling around too much. He will get tired and just disappear. He has to feel confident when he is around you, so knowing this fact you should know what to do, right!If you want him, you have to make him feel like he is the most important person for you. He likes a kind-hearted woman, polite and can get along with his family. When he feels sad, do not leave him alone, but be very supportive. Kind words and your smile will win him over, so this strong man will be like a chicken in your palm.

This is oh so accurate....

allie ♥ 12:01 PM

Monday, August 01, 2005

what do friends mean......

Suddenly...i feel kinda depressed. I wonder what do friends really mean? HAving FRIENDS who are virtually non-existent and barely makes effort to maintain the friendship....are they really considered real friends? Sigh....it's not that i wouldnt wanna consider them as my friends anymore...it's just that when you barely meet up with them, it just defeats the purpose of having them isn't it? Other than meeting up, conversations over MSN are also as rare as the occurence of a purple cow....

Oh well.....people i consider my so-called best friends havent appeared in front of my eyes for the past 3 months....despite me making the effort to ask them out. Except Eileen, who constantly messages me on MSN to make conversation. I do appreciate that, really...even if it's just a short "how are you doing?" kinda conversation, at least it showed that she does care. And we did meet up once too....considering that she's only in Singapore for like 2 times a year. So meeting her twice a year is already enough. Other friends, despite them being in Singapore 24/7, 365 days a year, they barely have the time to meet me like even 3, 4 times a year.

Kinda sad isn't it? I feel sad for myself. I miss my besties so much....really....but it seems like meetups dont work out everytime.....

Good thing i still have friends whom i dont consider best friends, but always make the effort to ask me out, talk to me over MSN, and have in-depth conversations with me. I really appreciate that.

What are best friends for...if best friends just come and go as they like, make no obvious effort in being there, and they appear much less often that other friends? I really dont know. I just feel upset and disappointed. Feel like crying.............and no one will see that.......

allie ♥ 10:57 AM