& my world will be coloured.

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

Hmmm.....

*~...fEeLiN': LaZy.....~*

Went shopping yesterday....met up with ger before meeting him to shop for his stuff. Saw nice skirt at Zara...loved it.....but bought a skirt at Zara the day before already....so didnt buy this skirt. Somemore...it didnt have the skirt in the size i wanted...sigh...but i loved that skirt....=(. Met him to go shopping.....but throughout the whole shopping trip...i didnt talk much to him.....can say that i sorta ignored him the whole time. I know he was upset....angry...whatsoever....can tell from his face that he was unhappy...but not becos ger was there...but becos i totally ignored him. I feel so bad......i agree that i didnt pay much attention to him....sigh. He said i didnt talk to him the whole time....well...i tried...but he didnt exactly talk much too.....and he could have talked to me too ma....so it wasnt entirely my fault. Sigh...but i did neglect him...and it made him feel realli bad....and made him think more again.

After shopping....he went home....and i continued shopping with ger cos she was waiting for her bf to come. Asked me to join them for movie....plus him too.....and i agreed. Had dinner at Ajisen...the ramen there is fabulous!! realli....never tasted such good ramen mee before.......and i finished every bit of it...so unlike the usual me..haha...dat's how gd it is. He came to join us for the movie...but didnt look too happy. I dun understand why he came when it was obvious that he was unhappy...and pulled a long face thruout the show....except towards the end. During the show...i kept asking him whats wrong...he said he was fuming...asked him why...he said he dun wanna say. I knew that he was angry with me...but acted as if i didnt know....acted ignorant...cos i knew he will tell me in the end. He was nicer to me towards the end of the show....sorta mellowed a little....didnt know what he was thinking la.....but guess he sorta forgotten a little. After the show...when the four of us are already making our way towards the mrt station to catch the last train...and me and him were trailing behind ger and bf.....he suddenly caught me and told me he drove. Haha....should have told me long ago ma.....we came all the way down from 7th floor to basement 2 and then he actually parked at 6th floor without saying a word till we reached the MRT station. He said he would see me home.....sorta can tell that he wanted some time alone...but still....dun think it's good of him to see me home while leaving ger and bf to take train home....so i asked whether he wanted to give them a lift. He said anything....though can tell he was a little reluctant...and i told him that if he wanted...he should be the one to tell them...not me. Haha....that's why he took so long to tell u guys he drove ger. Thought it would be good for him to drive them to eunos...but he let them off at Kallang instead.....think he wanted some time to talk that's why. Paiseh ger.....that's why i didnt insist that he send u guys to eunos. Think he was quite upset already...so didnt wanna make him do things this way. Hope u dun mind!

Yeah.....on our way....asked him what was wrong....he got defensive...and said that he didnt wanna say. So i didnt ask anymore lo. Just let him be. When i reached home....he seemed alright already....then he messaged me a funny message....haha....then messaged me another saying that he wanna take back the earlier message. Weird...i feel....so i asked him why. He said that that afternoon he felt that he lost me....and that he felt like he was being played a fool of. He said i never gave him any sign of how i feel or whatsoever.....oh well...just let him say lo. Not in the mood to argue or whatsoever....plus i felt kinda guilty for the afternoon so i didnt say much either. Dunno why too but after letting out everything...he said he was kinda childish to feel that way....and that he's fine already. Haha....dunno whats going on. I said that i did go out with him when he asked me and came down from my house at 3am during his birthday...didnt i. Think he felt guilty after hearing that....and said he knew. He said perhaps it was imbalance that caused his anger and whatever negative feelings that day. Said that he was alright. Hmmmm......realli wonder what was going on.....but in the end...everything came out fine. Glad that it ended that way.

Read his blog early this morning......saw a super duper loooooong complain piece about that afternoon. He was real angry....but after reading it...i feel that it's kinda funny....cos it sorta sounded a little like me.....cept that it sorta without any basis. He kept thinking along his own line of thought....never stopped to ask me how i felt or why was i acting this way. So he was just interpreting all the things in his own way. Haha.....thought i was kinda cute...and funny....so i laughed the whole thing off. Cos after all...everything's fine again. He's not angry anymore and that''s good.

Asked me to go to his house to watch movies. Told him it would feel realli weird....and wanted him to come over instead. but my house got realli hot....so i changed my mind and went over for the air con....haha. watched Shrek and slept a little while he was doing his jigsaw. He was realli nice today.....kept pouring water for me and giving me a jacket in case i feel cold...and keep asking me to lie on the sofa instead of sleeping in a sitting position. Drove me home after that....and said that if i wanted a lift back home after clubbing tonight can always call him. Would liked to have a lift home...but always didnt dare to ask cos i dun wanna make it seem like i'm using him or something. Realised that he always drives his frens around....and that his frens always ask him to drive them around and he always obliges. Well....perhaps i can do that too...but still...it doesnt feel right....still dun wanna sorta "use" him to drive me around. Well...it's nice of him and i appreciate it....glad that he offered. I kinda like things the way they are not...peaceful.....not getting pissed.....and he's acting better than before....at least in certain areas. He always complained on his blog that he doesnt wanna conform to my guy expectations...but i do see some changes. Hopefully that's permanent....if so....that would be good=).

Oh well....gotta decide whether to go clubbing later...think all my friends would be there. But feeling lazy and tired now. See how it turns out i guess....though i'm kinda itching for some action...hee...

allie ♥ 7:01 PM